It would never be Common - more - I said
-
Difference - had begun -
Many a bitterness - had been -
But that old sort - was done -
Or - if it sometime - showed - as 'twill -
Upon the Downiest - Morn _
Such bliss - had I - for all the years -
'Twould give an Easier - pain -
I'd so much joy - I told it - Red -
Upon my simple Cheek -
I felt it publish - in my Eye -
"Twas needless - any speak -
I walked - as wings - my body bore -
The feet - I former used -
Unnecessary - now to me -
As boos - would be -to Bird -
I put my pleasure all abroad -
I dealt a word of Gold
To every Creature - That I met -
And Dowered - all the World -
When - suddenly - my Riches shrank -
A Goblin - drank my Dew -
My Palaces - dropped tenantless -
Myself - was beggared - too -
I clutched at sounds -
I groped at shapes -
I touched the tops of Films -
I felt the Wilderness roll back
Along my Golden lines -
The Sackcloth - hangs upon the nail -
The Frock I used to wear -
But where my moment of Brocade -
My - drop - of India?
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NOTES
This poem was written in 1862. In the first five stanzas, Dickinson
describes the former joy in her life, a happiness free of bitterness
that she shared with the rest of the world. In the last three
stanzas, she describes her loss of such happiness; the final stanza
takes the loss to a spiritual level, as during this period allusions
to exotic places like India or Brazil were often synonomous with
heaven. After a life of joy and loss, Dickinson asks where her
spiritual reward lies.
Dower: :"that portion of the lands or property which his
widow enjoys during her life, after the death of her husband [This
is the usual present signification of the word.] 2: the property
which a woman brings to her husband in marriage. 3: the gift of
a husband for a wife, "Ask me never so much a dowry and gift."
- Gen XXXIV. 4: endowment; gift, "How great, how plentiful, how
rich a dower."-Davies." (Webster's Dictionary, 1856).
A Goblin-- drank my Dew: "...Would talk about the haunted
glen/ The wicked quaint fruit-merchant men,/ Their fruits like
honey to the throat/ But poison in the blood/ (Men sell not such
in any town)..." (from Goblin Market , Rossetti, MacMillian,
1935). It is plausible that this line alludes to Christina Rossetti's
long poem "Goblin Market", published in 1862, the same year Dickinson
wrote her poem. If the allusion is concrete then the reader, mindful
of Rossetti's poem while reading Dickinson, can appreciate the
lush, sensual images present in Goblin Market ("She clung
about her sister,/ Kissed and kissed and kissed her:/ Tears once
again/ Refreshed her shrunken eyes,/ Dropping like rain/ After
long sultry drouth;/ Shaking with aguish fear, and pain,/ She
kissed and kissed her with a hungry mouth.") alongside Dickinson's
more chaste yet similarly evocative imagery.
Brocade: "silk stuff, variegated with gold and silver,
or raised and enriched with flowers, foliage and other ornaments"
(Webster's Dictionary , 1856)
This poem corresponds to #430 in Johnson.
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